Sanity is just a day away....

What if I go through so many counselors that the only person left for me to see is Dr. Phil? I have been wondering what makes people go on Dr. Phil's show? Why would you ever ever want to air your dirty laundry on television? Now, when it comes to telling people not to boss you, I completely understand why you would go on Jerry Springer for that. Maybe I'll get to fill another rock star's prescription tonight. Who knows? Nothing gets more exciting that putting Rod Stewart's pills in a vial.

I just don't understand you humans...

Scary scary Jocelyn Wildenstein.  She's way past swan scary.  Today I want to investigate people who don't really look human anymore.  What a wonderful thing to take a closer look at.  So here is the first installment of "I Just Don't Understand You Humans".   
http://www.happywomanmagazine.com/Healthfitness/jocelynewildenstein.htm
http://website.lineone.net/~a1/jocelyne/

Here he is... its little Claude the Cat.  He's adjusting to his new surroundings very well.  He likes to sleep a lot --which is why we have so much in common.  I can't wait for you all to meet him soon!

Career path?

Today I just found out about a pharmacist position that I might be really good at.  It involves investigating people's complaints.  My two favorite things are complaining and investigating -- I can't believe there is a job that combines all the wonderful things I love!

This news is so important I cannot tell you what it is about...

I have decided to adopt a kitten.  A little tiny grey kitten.  I, of course, have to get the go-ahead from Kim.  I hope she agrees, we've talked about this before.  I snuck out of work (like the good spy that I am) and went to the shelter.  I originally went to look at a Siamese cat, but he didn't take to me that well.  This little tiny grey kitten (probably weighs 2lbs) stuck his little arm out the cage and waved at me.  Then I heard him say in a little kitten voice, "I can seeeeee you."   I knew it was meant to be at that very moment.  Then he jumped in the cage (da-doom, da-doom) and threw himself onto my chest.  It actually was fate, because he was just brought to the shelter this morning and I'm the first interested party.  Hoo-ray!  If all goes well, I will get him tomorrow. 
My cat will of course be alive and not made of hair.

Let's see what's going on today....
Kevin = roller coaster fun
 
(He's in the back row on the left, obviously)
and....
Linsay = sad and bored

The secret of my birth...

This weekend I discovered the secret of my birth.  When I was an infant in the hospital a series of curses and hexes were sent my way.... It went a little something like this:

I was a happy baby.  Then unbeknownst to me the nurses at the hospital one-by-one put their evil onto me.
"She shall only date men who think she so great that they can't be around her."
"Oh yes...and make her really sensitive to all the rejection she receives."


"Ahahahahah...she's doomed forever to a lifetime of being too great to date."
 
So, that is where I stand now.  Living out my cursed existence.  Any suggestions?

Sneak Preview

Here's a preview of the really dramatic scene where Deanne tells Linsay "You're sick, you're sick, you're siiiiick."  Its a very emotional part of the film.
 

Offended again

Apparently the military really offends me.
http://www.cnn.com/2004/US/07/21/military.perks.reut/index.html
First indestructable sandwiches, rice made with urine and/or swamp water, and now this!!!!

If a movie was created about all of us, this is the cast (according to the proper authorities)...

Kevin Maloney

played by Paul Ruebens

Aaron Bailey

played by Vince Vaughn

Linsay Davis

played by the lovely Beck Hansen

Sarah Rosenstein

played by Anne Ramsey

Kate Krusell

played by Kathleen Turner

Jeff and Carla Moellendorf

played by Sandra Bullock and Peter Krause

Deanne Buck

played by Rachael Leigh Cook

more to be posted....

"Oohhh, If you knew Pussy like I know Pussy...ohhhwhattta GAL!"

Offensive!

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/5479865/
 
I am offended by this article for many reasons.  The first being, swamp water and urine are not acceptable cooking mediums -- and then second being the "indestructable" sandwich that was created.  And you know what I was....

Kevin wins the award...

I can't believe you did it!  You actually found a picture of all thirty spies at work. 
 
It's hard to count them all...since they are so incognito...but there really are 30.  Amazing.
Click here for a larger view.

Even more!

I have found
Spies behind trees
Russian spies
and even child spies

so many spies...

This is an actual picture of a spy hiding.  Keep your eyes peeled.

Thirty Spies

So....Kevin, I told you that I would try this.  I thought about naming it "Red Hat Party", but that would exclude you.  I thought that calling it "Thirty Spies" might bring spies out of their hiding places (those being the bushes, obviously).  I will post more to you throughout the day, if this indeed works.